John 3:16

Get it ?? Today is March 16th, or 3/16. What a perfect day to talk about a famous bible verse.

So what exactly does John 3:16 say? It says :

For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.
-------------------

Hmmmmmmm. I don't see what is so special about this verse, it seems just as stupid as any other bible verse if you ask Me.

-God so loved the world. - I doubt that, all evidence points to the fact that God hates the world. He's pissed off, jealous, and angry that we always fuck up (but He invented us). Doesn't it seem odd that an all powerful being has such petty human emotions as jealousy, and anger??

-He gave His only begotten Son - Well now, I never asked you to give up your son. Nor did I say that He had to be an only child! I mean - your God ... why didn't you just magically impregnate 100 women instead of just one?

- And you really didn't give up your Son .. because your son is YOU! And since you know everything, then you already knew that after 3 days you would rise again and go right back to heaven where you came from in the first place. What kind of sacrifice is that?

- Shall not perish, but have everlasting life - BULLSHIT! Everybody perishes. Anyone and everyone who has ever lived has perished. And what's this everlasting life stuff? Do you have any proof that there is everlasting life? NO! That's the beauty of religion ... all the magic happens AFTER YOU DIE!!! Wow .... what a concept! No way anyone can ever prove you wrong!

--------------------

I'd like to propose My own bible verse that makes about as much sense.

For Les so loved the world, that He sent a spaghetti monster to watch over you during your time on earth, and that all who believe in the pasta fairy shall never die, but live eternally forever in the big meatball in the sky.

Notice any similarities??? Yeah ... you can't prove ME wrong either. Enough said.

Genesis 1:16

And God made two great lights; the greater light to rule the day, and the lesser light to rule the night: he made the stars also.

--------------------

Now I know I've talked about this already, but it really bugs Me. How do Christians read this and not say "Wait a minute .. this don't make sense? This is something man would write back in the day when they didn't know any better!"

- God made 2 great lights - WRONG

- the lesser light to rule the night - WRONG

- he made the stars also - AS IF THE STARS ARE ANY DIFFERENT THAN THE GREATER LIGHT! They are all suns !!!!!!! How could God be so stupid? Oh yeah, it wasn't God .. it was man who just didn't know any better. Silly Me.

-And people would say "It was written by man, not inspired by God, so of course they are going to make some mistakes" To which I would reply, "Then what the hell are we doing looking for the divine answers in it for????????"

WHAT A DAY!!!!!!!!!!!

*Warning* - long posting .. but well worth it!



Ohhhhhhh some days I'm just happy to be alive! I lead a pretty quiet, uneventful life so I'm pretty easily amused.

Today 3 Jehovah's Witnesses came to My country door. First of all, I think you gotta be pretty desperate to go out to the country where there's only a house every 5 miles. I mean how are you going to meet your Jesus quota that way????

So they tell Me they're here to talk to Me about God, and hand Me a couple of brochures, one of them is about 'What does God think of alcohol?" to which I replied, "Didn't Jesus turn the water into wine? Oh yeah, and weren't some of his disciples so drunk they passed out butt naked?"

And the reply was "Yes, people have messed up this world something terrible."

And My response "Didn't God create people?? Isn't God perfect? Why would God create something that didn't work just so He could punish it? Is God that sadistic? If I built a car that blew up every 3 feet, wouldn't I just start over with a NEW car instead of just blaming the old car (that I created) as being a piece of crap?"

*** at this point the poor ladies knew this wasn't going to be the 'average' house call.

Then they pointed out that all the earthquakes and hurricanes are God's way of saying that the end times are near.

I simply said, "All the earthquakes and stuff are the cause of 'climate change' that's probably caused by HUMANS and it's the earth's way of saying "KNOCK IT OFF!!" I also pointed out that driving around in the country telling old folk tales is not helping their 'carbon footprint' either! And why is this end times the right one? What happened to 1988, what happened to 2000? Are you now selling 2012 as the magic time??" I also pointed out that the odd weather that we are seeing ain't NOTHING .... just wait another 10 or 20 years and watch the fun! Oh yeah, I also pointed out that IF God creates these earthquakes, it was sure nice of Him to slaughter 200,000 innocent people in Haiti. Nice guy!!!

Then I felt obligated to point out that their Bible says the earth is around 6000 years old even though every single branch of science has unanimously agreed that the earth is around 4.5 billion years old and is whizzing through the universe which is around 14.4 billion years old.

They said "God created MAN around 6000 years old, not the earth and stars and stuff."

My response "BULLSHIT ...... In the beginning there was a endless VOID, and God created the earth, and the stars, and the planets, and the trees, and the waters, and , and , and. Then He was exhausted so He took a nap on the 7th day."

And they tried to say "It doesn't really say how long man has been around in the Bible."

And I responded "BULLSHIT ..... it's one of many fatal errors in the bible. They put a genealogy chart that can be traced back to the days of Adam and Eve, and that same time God made them, He created everything else too!! Nice try!!"

** At this point I started to realize that they didn't have much of a leg to stand on with their questions, so I decided to turn the tables around and throw out a few questions of My own.

So I asked THEM - "How come God never answers prayers? How come Christian people who get married have a higher divorce rate than non-Christians? How come there is NO evidence of a world wide flood? Wouldn't it be safe to say that if you were in Pakistan right now doing the same thing you'd be handing out brochures of how Mohammad is the son of Allah? Why are there unicorns mentioned in the Bible? How come the Bible says the earth is the center of all the universe and everything spins around us, when it clearly doesn't? Do you really believe that Noah lived to be 950 years old, and at around 500 years old He took on the task of building a 450 foot ark made up of gopher wood? Isn't it odd that God's 7th commandment is 'thou shalt not kill' and yet God himself commanded the death of millions of people?"

Oh yeah .. needless to say, I don't think these poor Jehovah witnesses were quite up to the task of dealing with a prick like Me! If it wasn't the middle of winter, I would have taken them on the tour of "Noah's Ark" that I measured out on My property. I think I could have spent a few hours with these ladies ... hell, I might have even convinced them to become agnostic!

And as we parted ways they asked if they could come back some day and discuss God with Me again (must be part of the contract to get to Heaven). To which I kindly said "NO". I pointed out that I would enjoy them coming to My door spouting religion to Me just as much as they would like it if a bunch of naked men had a gay orgy on their front doorstep. I wished them luck, and told them you don't need religion to be a good person, it's OK to just go out in the world and be good person all on your own!

And My last words to them were the best sound advice I thought I could give, and that is "I don't know all the answers .. but YOU DON'T EITHER! And that's OK! Take care and good luck."

----------------------

So all in all, that was a hell-of-a-lot of fun. I'm kinda disappointed I didn't tell them to come back. But I guess if I ever want to get into a heated debate about religion with someone, I shouldn't have to go very far to make that happen.

All My Rowdy Friends Have Settled Down

All My rowdy friends have settled down ....... AND TURNED RELIGIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!

What the hell happens to people when they get older? Are they all afraid to die or something? Did they just reach a point in life where they thought "Hmmm, I'm getting older, I better get My shit together with God!"

I have yet another friend who apparently has gone 'Bible' on Me. Yeah, someone who I could call up and bullshit with, joke around about stupid stuff, and even make a couple dirty jokes now and then. But not anymore .. now I'll get scorned for offending Him. Really?? I've known this prick for over 15 years .. and all of a sudden God came into His life and changed Him? BULLSHIT!!!

It's strange, the older I get the more I want to know the TRUTH about stuff. But it seems like the older other people get, they just want to fall into the pattern of what everyone else does. I guess everybody else is worried about being such a good person here on earth because they believe in the fairytale that they are going to live forever in the next life. Well I sincerely think God will be able to see through the bullshit of 'acting good now just to get a reward later' but what the hell do I know?

I guess each one of us has a choice to live any way we want, and for that I'm happy to be in the country we're in. The part that pisses Me off is that FACTS AND LOGIC overwhelming conclude that an invisible space daddy does NOT exist!!!!!!!!! YES ... there MAY be a creator out there ... but NO, you are not having a personal relationship with it. Nor did it send His Son down one day to die on a cross!!!! If there is a magical creator out there, NONE OF US have the slightest frickin' clue about Him, nor does He seem to give a shit about intervening in our personal lives, nor can you pray to 'it' and expect an answer!!!!!!!!

I predicted awhile back that all My friends would eventually fade out to next to nothing .. and sure enough it's coming true. Granted a big chunk of them finds Me too offensive and just a plain prick. Even still, a lot of them are just 'too busy' in their lifestyles to keep up on being friends, or have 'found GOD' and so friendships become second place I guess. Well, at any rate, at least I can say what I always say .. People are fucking stupid!!!! Because if your life is too busy because of God, or because of work, or because of your hectic lifestyle, then your living a very stupid life. Which is why I've disciplined Myself over the past couple years to just shut out the rest of the world and be happy with My dog. A good dog is all any real man needs in life anyway!!

So all you 'past friends' out there who now spend your days talking to thin air ... good luck to you. I predict that well over half of you will be right back in the gutter with Me in a short time, and the other half will go on and create a God in your head to get you through the rest of your life. I guess maybe it's a good thing, because anyone who needs to create a delusional entity in their heads to get by in life is probably not someone I could have stimulating conversation with anyway.

ConfusLes

ConfusLes wonder: What Jesus thinks when He realizes that the image of His grizzly death on the cross has been turned into the most lucrative, money grubbing logo in human history. And that 2000 years later, it's still raking in mountains of cold, hard cash .. mostly from poor people.

Isn't it enough?

-Isn't it enough that the bible says that the earth is around 6000 years old, and yet every single branch of science claims that it is more like 4 to 5 billion years old? Oh yeah .. and they have the evidence to PROVE it too!

-Isn't it enough that most of the people you talk to say that prayer does not work, and yet in the bible, you read passage after passage about praying to solve all kinds of issue in life.

-Isn't it enough that in the bible, God healed tons of people of all kinds of diseases and afflictions, and yet today .. NO ONE is ever cured (that is to say, no one is cured of anything except for invisible problems that probably never really get cured in the first place).

-Isn't it enough that there are countless errors in the bible, which is supposed to be the inspired word of the all knowing God, and yet we still base our life on this book supposedly being the infallible word to base our moral and ethical principles on.

-Isn't it enough that the 10 commandments are a moderately poor list of values to base our lives on? The first 4 talk about nothing but a jealous God who demands that you worship nothing but Him, and the other 6 have some good points, but are actually repetitive in a way. Not to mention it doesn't talk about child abuse, or rape, or other serious issues that would downgrade a society if ignored.

-Isn't it enough that married Christians get divorced at the same rate as non Christians?

-Isn't it enough that we have killed millions, upon millions, upon millions of people in the name of religion? Does THAT FACT right there tell you that this may NOT be a good thing to base our lives on?

-Isn't it enough that the Catholic church had 1000's of priest involved with a sex scandal with children .... and then TRIED TO COVER IT UP!!!!!!!! I honestly can't understand how there are any Catholic churches thriving today! What does it take before we shut something down?

-----------------------------------------------------------

I could go on, and on, and on .. but I think you get the idea. When will it really be enough to lay to the waist side the old, mythical, folktales of yesteryear .. and start living our lives with logic, and reason, and under the golden rule of, "Treat others as you wish to be treated." Amen.

Hell : No Vacancy

I just did a little figuring the other day using today's populations and figures.

Today, there are about 6.4 BILLION people on earth.

Today, there is about 2.1 billion people that claim to be Christian. This is a very generous guess.

Now I would like to add that not ALL 2.1 billion Christians are TRUE Christians. In fact, I would say that very few of them live up to Biblical standards that are asked of them. We all know people who are Christian, and who go to church, and put on a good Samaritan image. But how many people do you know that live every single day 'For the Lord'? I mean their entire life rotates around Jesus? Not just every Sunday for an hour or so ... I mean all the time. Every decision that's comes up is made by praying to Jesus for guidance. I would bet that MAYBE 10% of the Christians you know actually live up to the standard of ACTING like a true Christian. And I would say 10% is a generous figure again.

So .. if 2.1 billion people are claiming to be Christian, but only 10% of them live up to the standards, then we can logically conclude that only 210 million people are true, born again Christians.

So in conclusion .. the earths population (6.4 Billion), subtract the true Christians (210 million), leaves us with 6.19 BILLION people would be going to hell if Jesus returned today!

That 6,190,000,000 people ..... DOOMED TO HELL!!! That's roughly 97% of the entire population of earth ... GOING TO HELL .. to be tortured, and tormented, with screaming, and pain, and fire, and brimstone, and all that other good stuff!!!

So God created man in HIS image, and yet 97% of us are complete screw ups!! Yeah .. I'd have to say that once you do the math, it becomes clear that Christianity, as we know it, is NOT a higher, all powerful, God up in the sky .. But rather, an invention. An invention by MAN to keep people in line, and keep them in fear. Oh yeah, and keep them shelling out money to support this bullshit.

I rest My case Your Honor. Amen!

Christianity

The belief that a cosmic jewish zombie who was his own father can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master, so that he can remove from your soul an evil force that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a magical tree.
Yeah, that's a bit harsh, I know ... but it really gets the point across doesn't it??

Let's take apart a bit and see how "far fetched" it really is.

-Cosmic jewish zombie: Well your talking to someone who resides somewhere above us in the sky, in fact He's everywhere out there, I'd say that's cosmic. And we all know Jesus was a Jew, that's all He talks about, His chosen people. And zombie, well He did rise from the dead, and was seen walking about earth for awhile after his death so I'd call that a definition of a zombie.

Was His own father who can make you live forever: Yup, Jesus is the son on God, but yet, they were one in the same person somehow. And if you worship Him, you'll reign forever and ever in Heaven.

Eat His flesh and telepathically accept Him as your master: Not only eat His flesh, but drink His blood. I'm still trying to forget all the trips I made up to the front of the church to eat a bread wafer and some grape juice. And yes, you DO need to bow down and get on your knees and accept Him as your personal savior or you won't be SAVED!

Remove evil forces that exist in humanity: Yes, it's called sin. And only Jesus can wash away our sins. Do whatever you want, but don't forget to ask for forgiveness and your slate is clean again.
Rib woman, talking snake, magical tree: And yes, all these are true too. Eve was made from Adams rib, because He was lonely. And the snake was Satan, who talked to them and convinced them to eat off the tree. And the tree certainly did magic as after that moment .. sin was created!



So as you can see, the starting paragraph of this blog seems a bit harsh and blunt, but the sad part is, it's really true to the word. So the next time someone ask you if you believe in God, just memorize that paragraph above and recite that to them and watch the expression on their face. I happen to like that paragraph as it makes people THINK, does this make sense? And as you know, "people thinking" seems to be on the decline these days. AMEN.

Don't forget to grab a friend and have them spade or neutered to control the stupid population.


Todays RBV:

Leviticus 20:18 And if a man shall lie with a woman having her sickness, and shall uncover her nakedness; he hath discovered her fountain, and she hath uncovered the fountain of her blood: and both of them shall be cut off from among their people.

All right all you sick twisted people out there, no humping while she's on the rag!!!