Praise Jesus

Oh praise the Lord! Jesus I give thee thanks! God answers prayer! The Lord is so awesome!!

As I'm writing this, I'm slowly recovering from the worst case of strep throat and flu that I can remember having. I won't mention the fact that I probably got it from work, which is reason 153 of "Why Work Is Stupid!" Anyway, within a matter of about 2 hours, I went from feeling normal to laying flat on My back in bed with no strength! Now that's impressive! The next day I headed to the Doc and got on a pretty powerful dose of azithromycin, and sure enough a couple of days later I have some strength again, My 104 degree fever has broke and I'm returning to normal. Please note that I am NOT writing this for sympathy that I'm sick! I couldn't give a shit if no one knew that I'm 'under the weather' .. it's just not that big of deal!!!! I'm writing this as an example of observation of human stupidity by comparison.

Now there are several fascinating things to observe about this. The fact that a microscopic germ can bring a man to his knees is pretty damn impressive. The fact that a person can go from 'well-to-hell' in a matter of a couple hours all because a little microbe is reeking havoc inside his body is also pretty cool. Or the fact that it doesn't always have to be a volcano or massive tsunami to wipe out a big chunk of people. But I'd like to focus on the fact on just HOW I got well in the first place.

So many people today, in fact, I'd say a dangerous percentage of people, would give thanks to Jesus for healing them of sickness ... just like the Bible says. These same people don't even bat an eye to the fact that the FIRST place they went was to the damn MEDICAL DOCTOR to see what science and biology could do about it! In fact .. if you did corner these people about the fact that science made them feel better, they would just argue that JESUS gave us the knowledge to create antibiotics. It's really a no win situation with these people. It just pisses Me off that people are this ignorant to the truth in this day and age. That there is REAL, testable, demonstrable evidence as to why we get sick and how medical science can fix it. But these ignorant assholes would rather take the medicine, but give all the credit to the fact that their church put their sickness on a 'prayer chain' at the local church! Fucking assholes!!

If I had one wish, it would be that all these religious nutcases out there were not allowed to use man-made science in ANY PART of their lives. Everything and anything they need will have to come out of their magic book. Going by that theory, you wouldn't have a car, or running water, or electricity, or your tennis shoes, your cellphone, or your computer. Yeah .. I think a 1 month course in reality would shock you back into the real world. I would say that all you'd have left in your life would be to go live at your church ... but since there is so much science involved in that building too ... you wouldn't be allowed to stay there for shelter either.

So as I continue to feel better and recover from a massive ass whooping of strep throat, I would like to give a huge shout of thanks to all the people in the medical science field who have dedicated countless hours of their lives, just to ensure that other people don't have to suffer from ailments. No doubt, your efforts have made the world an incredibly better place to live in. And sorry Jesus ... since you had NO part in this equation what-so-ever, I give you NO praise, NO thanks, and NO worship! Sorry to pop your ego bubble. Amen.

All My Rowdy Friends Have Settled Down

All My rowdy friends have settled down ....... AND TURNED RELIGIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!

What the hell happens to people when they get older? Are they all afraid to die or something? Did they just reach a point in life where they thought "Hmmm, I'm getting older, I better get My shit together with God!"

I have yet another friend who apparently has gone 'Bible' on Me. Yeah, someone who I could call up and bullshit with, joke around about stupid stuff, and even make a couple dirty jokes now and then. But not anymore .. now I'll get scorned for offending Him. Really?? I've known this prick for over 15 years .. and all of a sudden God came into His life and changed Him? BULLSHIT!!!

It's strange, the older I get the more I want to know the TRUTH about stuff. But it seems like the older other people get, they just want to fall into the pattern of what everyone else does. I guess everybody else is worried about being such a good person here on earth because they believe in the fairytale that they are going to live forever in the next life. Well I sincerely think God will be able to see through the bullshit of 'acting good now just to get a reward later' but what the hell do I know?

I guess each one of us has a choice to live any way we want, and for that I'm happy to be in the country we're in. The part that pisses Me off is that FACTS AND LOGIC overwhelming conclude that an invisible space daddy does NOT exist!!!!!!!!! YES ... there MAY be a creator out there ... but NO, you are not having a personal relationship with it. Nor did it send His Son down one day to die on a cross!!!! If there is a magical creator out there, NONE OF US have the slightest frickin' clue about Him, nor does He seem to give a shit about intervening in our personal lives, nor can you pray to 'it' and expect an answer!!!!!!!!

I predicted awhile back that all My friends would eventually fade out to next to nothing .. and sure enough it's coming true. Granted a big chunk of them finds Me too offensive and just a plain prick. Even still, a lot of them are just 'too busy' in their lifestyles to keep up on being friends, or have 'found GOD' and so friendships become second place I guess. Well, at any rate, at least I can say what I always say .. People are fucking stupid!!!! Because if your life is too busy because of God, or because of work, or because of your hectic lifestyle, then your living a very stupid life. Which is why I've disciplined Myself over the past couple years to just shut out the rest of the world and be happy with My dog. A good dog is all any real man needs in life anyway!!

So all you 'past friends' out there who now spend your days talking to thin air ... good luck to you. I predict that well over half of you will be right back in the gutter with Me in a short time, and the other half will go on and create a God in your head to get you through the rest of your life. I guess maybe it's a good thing, because anyone who needs to create a delusional entity in their heads to get by in life is probably not someone I could have stimulating conversation with anyway.

Pray for Me

Why the hell does everyone pray? Is everybody just F-ing stupid? Why don't people see the link between 'praying' and 'prayer NOT working'? What the hell is wrong with everyone?

These are big questions that may never be answered, but they still piss Me off.

Prayer has been scientifically proven to have NO BETTER ODDS than that of random luck! They have done double blind study after study on this! Maybe it's just God trying to trick us. He doesn't like being put to 'the test', so when we test Him .. He makes it not work! Yeah .. that's it.

I cannot prove that there is no God, nor can you prove that there is. But I can prove that prayer does not work .. and yet everybody still does it! I just don't get it! To go one step further, I prove that there is no God because prayer doesn't work. The bible talks about prayer and praying all the time, and how important it is. Well now ... if prayer has been proven to NOT WORK, then I might add that your magic book don't work either! But people won't put that together for some reason. Hell, I can't even get them to believe that prayer is full of shit!

I once again must come to the conclusion that I always come to, but wish I wouldn't. And that is people are just plain fucking stupid!

I think about George Carlin and what He said about prayer and can't help but chuckle a bit. He talks about how God has a divine plan for each and every one of us .. all laid out so perfect. And here we are on earth with billions of prayers going up in the sky all the time, each and every one of those prayers will alter God's divine plan in some way. Why the hell would you expect God to answer your feeble little prayer just to fuck up His master plan??? Not to mention, with all those prayers you'd have some people wanting rain, some people not wanting rain, some people wanting the Vikings to win, some people wanting the Saints to win, some people wanting to win the war, but the other side is praying to win the war too.

STOP THE FUCKING STUPIDITY ALREADY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Holy crap people are dumb!!!! People in this country have got things so fucked up backwards that if you dare say you don't believe in prayer your looked at like some evil nutcase .. when just the opposite is true!!! AND I CAN PROVE IT!!!! But that doesn't seem to matter! America just insists on being a backward ass country compared to much of the rest of the world that is leaving us in the 'bronze age' dust! Is it any wonder that on a scale that shows how many people believe in scientific evolution, we rank 34th out of 35 of industrialized countries. How sad.

I'm doing My part to try and change the world, but I can't do it alone. In fact some days, all I can do is sit back and observe all you idiots while every time you pray, you get let down .. again, and again, and again, and again.

I leave you with a quote that just about says it all.



TWO HANDS WORKING CAN DO MORE THAN A THOUSAND CLASPED IN PRAYER - ANONYMOUS

In the News (Haiti Aftermath)

Haiti amputees face desperate quest for limbs.

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Now I'm not making fun of Haiti here. What they got just plain sucks! It's a shitty, tragic situation down there, no 2 ways about it.

BUT!

I would like to 'CALL OUT' to God to finally put this debate to rest! That prayer really DOES WORK!!! I pray that all the Haitian people who lost their limbs be miraculously healed by the Lord our God. For it says in the bible, that anything we ask for in His glorious name, shall be done.

Well now I can't think of a more perfect time than to give back their limbs to the poor children and adults of Haiti. Surely a loving, just, and true God would find it in Himself to magically make their arms and legs grow back again! Would a God be so cruel that He would let innocent children go through their entire life without any legs or arms?? Haven't these poor people been though enough??

So My prayer has went out! There aren't many clouds in the sky so reception shouldn't be a problem. I'll check the news tomorrow and see if any 'magic' has happened down there. Amen.

People are Wacky!

Well, with just 2 more days to go before the vote for the next president is here, the religious wackos really come out of the woodwork.

People are having "prayer marathons", they are fasting, and having Bible readings at the Capital until the votes are decided. Wow, what a waste of time. Imagine praying praying straight through from now until Tuesday night. Or how about not eating from now until Tuesday night. People are frickin' nuts I tell you. Thousands upon thousands of people gathering together praying to an imaginary person in the sky to seek guidance from. I say "If you got that much time on your hands that you don't need to do anything until Tuesday night, then go get yourself a few Whoppers from Burger King and rent all six Rocky movies." At least you'll be doing something worthwhile with your time.

And when it's all said and done, God will not lose no matter who gets elected. If the Christians are happy, then God answered their prayers. If the Christians don't get what they want, then God is punishing America for not being obedient to Him. As you know, God works in mysterious way, OR, God wins no matter what the outcome because it's one thing that Christians are never short of ... excuses.

So when you go vote on Tuesday, do what you feel is the best thing for you and your country and don't rely on imaginary spirits to help you out because then you'll just start hearing voices in your head and thinking your talking to God or something. Use your rational, logical, common sense and vote what YOU think is best. And if I can't convince you to vote for Ron Paul, then at least vote for the LEAST religious person out of the group. Amen.

P.S. - Sorry about the lack of blogging lately. As I've said, winter is moving in and I need to take advantage of every nice day that's left to get things ready for my long winter retirement which will be spent pre-planning my stay-at-home-empire. I really don't feel like going to cut lumber and gather hay in 3 feet of snow (even though I'll have time too ... HA HA HA HA!!)


Todays RBV: Numbers 25:4 And the LORD said unto Moses, Take all the heads of the people, and hang them up before the LORD against the sun, that the fierce anger of the LORD may be turned away from Israel.-

The POWER of Prayer!

So, are you one of those stupid people who believes in prayer? What an absolute fraud this thing is. It is possibly the best trick of all time. Where else are you going to get millions and millions of people all doing something thinking that it's working, when in reality, there is no such thing? I could spend half my life dreaming up something like this and not even come close to the cleverness of the deception of prayer.
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Let's analyze prayer a bit, shall we? One one side, we will be praying to the Lord Almighty, creator of heaven and earth. On the other side, we will be praying to the limp stalks of celery that haven't been eaten in awhile in the crisper.
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All right, prayer number one. Let's pray that that you get that new job you been wanting so badly. The interview went good, why not pray for it and help boost your odds a bit.

Lets see the results of prayer number one. The Lord Almighty has given you 3 options. Yes, No, and maybe later. Hmmmm, that don't seem too positive. WAIT A MINUTE!! That's the only 3 options that exist!! Yes, No, and maybe later. There is NO OTHER option out there. But for some stupid reason, I've been accepting these answers all my life when I've prayed. Well ... maybe that was just for this prayer, maybe the next prayer will give me different results.

Let's check in on the stalks of limp celery in the crisper. They say ....... nothing!!! I guess praying to stalks of celery is not an effective way to get answers.
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All right, prayer number 2. Let's pray with a friend that Jesus will come down and talk with us. It says right in the Bible that if 2 or more pray for something, it shall be done.

OK, let's check in on the Lord Almighty's answer. Hmmmmmm, silence. Nothing. And worse yet, He didn't even show up. He pulled a NO SHOW!!!! JESUS CHRIST THAT PISSES ME OFF.

Well maybe the limp stalk of celery can make Jesus appear. Hmmmm, nope nothing happening here either. It appears that this particular prayer isn't working.
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I got it!!! For prayer number 3, lets take 1000 cancer patients in hospital A, and pray to the Lord Almighty to heal them like He did when He was on earth. Then, we'll ask the limp stalks of celery in the crisper to heal ANOTHER 1000 cancer patients in hospital B.

And the results are in. The Lord Almighty has appeared to have healed 45% of the people with cancer. Hmmmm, not as good as I hoped for but still better than nothing. I'm certain that He kicked the limp stalks of celery in the crispers butt.

Let's see, the limps stalks of celery in the crispers results have just come in. It shows .... hmmmm, 45% of the people have also survived. Now that's strange?? Limps stalks of celery in the crisper have the SAME power as the Lord Almighty. How can that be??
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Could it possibly be that praying to limp stalks of celery in the crisper yield the same results as the Lord Almighty because prayer, to no matter who or what you pray for, doesn't work??? Is it possible that EVERY prayer out there has the same results?? Yes, No, and maybe later?? Isn't that really the only options there are for ANY prayer?? Isn't it true that if we pray to God and get a certain result, and then turn back time and pray to a rock, the results would be exactly the same. I know, it's hard to think about it, but if you let your rational, logical brain work a little bit, you will find yourself agreeing with this last sentence. This is because we trick ourselves into thinking that prayer really works, when the truth is, the results are EXACTLY the same with or without prayer.

If you still don't believe me, then go do the research yourself. There have been countless studies done on prayer. Groups of people have prayed for the sick, while other sick people received no prayer at all, and the results are the same every time. Maybe that's why Christians get divorced at just about the same rate as non-Christians, even though the Bible says that if two people are married in my name, let no man tear it apart. Because everything we've been taught to believe, is really just an illusion, or a crutch. And when you leave the "bubble" of Christianity and start to analyze it rationally, and logically, you start to see the light. That we've all been duped to believe that prayer works, and someone up above is listening to every prayer we've ever said. But unfortunately, the answer is always the same ... yes, no, or maybe later.

And when something that your praying for is SO OBVIOUS for the good, there is NO reason it would ever be denied, and yet .... it doesn't get answered, you make up some stupid excuse like "God works in mysterious ways." Just like when my Father was dying at the hospital, we all prayed for Him to live, we had prayer groups at churches set up for Him, and you know what? He died anyway. And the stupid, irrational "true" Christians made up a bullshit excuse to get God off the hook, like "We don't always understand why God does what He does." I don't remember the prayer saying, "Dear Lord, please let my Dad live, unless you'd rather let Him die." NO, NO, NO .... that is NOT what ANY of us prayed. We all prayed the God would LET HIM LIVE!!! EVERY SINGLE ONE OF US, but it didn't work, do you know why? Because prayer doesn't work, it's an illusion. You see, God cannot lose when it comes to prayer, He wins every single time. If you get your wish, it was God. If you get your wish 6 months from now, it was God. If you never get your wish, God knows you didn't need it. And if you look at those 3 options, you'll soon realize that there is no other choices left. Like I said, He can't lose.

So smarten up people, prayer is a nice thought, but it's totally delusional. And talking to the sky is really not what smart, rational, logical people should be doing. We should be trying our best to make these "wishes" happen on our own, and when they don't come true, we need to deal with the results and stop passing them up to imaginary things in the sky.

In other words ..... QUIT BEING SO DAMN STUPID!



And with that I close on some GREAT RBV's on prayer.


Matthew 7:7 Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.

Matthew 21:21 Verily I say unto you, If ye have faith, and doubt not, ye shall not only do this which is done to the fig tree, but also if ye shall say unto this mountain, Be thou removed, and be thou cast into the sea; it shall be done.

Mark 11:24 Therefore I say unto you, What things soever ye desire, when ye pray, believe that ye receive them, and ye shall have them.

And lastly from the book of State of Les: There's a sucker born every minute