Sunday, January 24, 2010

Stupidity Alert


As I type this, we are in a major winter storm that started out with freezing rain, then turned into snow and should dump 8-12 inches before it's said and done.

It's times like these that I wish I was God .. or at least a bird or something! Something that could float above the roads and watch morons attempt to drive down a highway with continuous 1 foot drifts across it. I just witnessed a moron in a little passenger car hit the ditch not 100 yards down the road from My house. Soon, more morons were coming down the road and stopping to see what's going on. I drove this road last night .. it's NOT GOOD at all. But I knew that the road conditions sucked the minute I turned onto it, these morons with their little cars knew it too, but they still pressed on and ended up in the ditch.

Now one would think that I, living so close by, would have gotten all bundled up and ran out to see if I could help. But you'd be wrong. I sat on My couch with a nice cup of java in My hands and watched out the window during the whole thing. You also might think that I was hoping that no one got hurt, but you'd be wrong again. My only wish was that they didn't start walking down My driveway looking for help. I know .. I know, I'm a heartless prick. But not really.

You see .. I have a hell of a hard time rewarding human stupidity. This storm was predicted a week ago, but yet there will always be SOMEBODY out there who is stupid enough to think they have to get to the mall, or go out and get some milk. I just can't see logic in this, therefore I cannot assist you in your stupidity quest. Helping stupid people is something that everyone does, so we all expect it. Hell, it's even what the government does! The government is a classic example of helping out poor, stupid, lazy people. But I have to 'stick to My guns' and say it's just not right. Maybe a little bit of misery will help you learn your lesson. Don't come knocking on My door because you were stupid enough to go out in this weather, I'm playing 'Hot Wheels' with the kids, drinking a nice cup of coffee, and I have 2 forms of dead animal cooking on the skillet making the house smell awesome!! But at the same time, thank you for the entertainment.

So this moron's day is ruined. That gallon of milk He needed so badly will end up costing Him around 100 bucks or more with the towing costs. And when the weather people and science say "Stay at home" or "No travel advised" ... do Me a favor ... stay the fuck home!!!!!!!!!!

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