Tuesday, December 9, 2008

fire .. Fire .. FIRE !!!!!


Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls ... the picture you are looking at is not a fake. It has not been altered in any way. NO photo-shop program was used in manipulating this photo. It is a genuine photo of Me, blowing on my hot ashes and creating fire from nothing but pieces of wood (and a piece of paper towel I substituted for dry grass).

That's right, it took all damn day, my hands are raw, my back is killing me from being hunched over, the house stinks, I burnt the counter, even my wife ruptured a blood vessel in her hand .... but God Dammit .. WE MADE FIRE !!!!

It wasn't until 8 o'clock last night and we ended up in the warmth of the kitchen but we got it done. I say "we" because after what seemed like a 1000 attempts, my hands we so cramped I couldn't hold the wood anymore so I needed to get the wife involved. She was reluctant at first, but was quite helpful near the end. This was either due to the fact that She felt sorry for me, or She was truly interested, or She was sick of hearing me bitch about it. Plus the fact that I promised myself that before the day ended I WOULD have created fire and DAMMIT I did !!!!!!

Of course now that I've done it, I also realize what I was doing wrong that would have saved a few painful hours of mistakes. What were they you ask??? OH NO ........ I'm not telling!! YOU were the ones laughing at Me about this in the first place. Now when all hell breaks loose and there is no power, no heat, no matches, no NOTHING ... in the middle of NO WHERE, I will have a fire going and you will be freezing you ass off!!! But in retrospect, none of that will ever happen so your probably safe.

At any rate, life can now continue as this hurdle has been passed. Without being able to create fire from sticks, I don't think anything else on my "to do" list would be able to get done. Not to mention, I am now ONE step closer to God!! Or one step closer to "being" God .... I forget which one.

Oh yeah, one last thing. Give that man who invented matches a nice pay raise ... He deserves it.





Todays RBV: Luke 16:18 Whosoever putteth away his wife, and marrieth another, committeth adultery: and whosoever marrieth her that is put away from her husband committeth adultery.


Soooooo, anyone who gets divorced and remarries has committed adultery. AND, anyone who marries someone who was divorced has committed adultery. Hmmmm, I wonder how many people in church every Sunday fit this description??? And yet their better than Me (married 17 years to the same woman), because THEY are Christians!

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